The End Begins, The Begin of a New Start... / Thursday, August 27, 2009
Yeap...
its finally my holidays...
Exam ended with my last paper as a flop.. don't think the grade will turn out good at all....
And since now its the holidays, i've to complete my PP and work at the same time...
Then with upcoming school events on the line.. sigh... this is gonnabe such a strain.. oh well..
Seems like its been a long long long time since i posted something..
Too buzy with School work that i really couldnt bother to write something here...
Thoughts come and go... nothing different about me...
just that everytime i think about what has happened this year...
I kinda feel that i'm just that dumb.. to waste so much effort on something particularly not a part of my life.
I've made so many wrong chioces, and i just cant regret about it...
Sickening...
/this is the me in I.
3:09 PM
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Remourse... / Thursday, August 06, 2009
The start of the month seemed awful...
the feeling of remourse grows...
every minute, every hour.. everything feels heavier...
I dare not wander much with the full moon...
With that a lone star sits far away from..
cloudless as it just rained not too long ago..
I keep thinking why did I ever make those choices?
and how could i have broken so many promises?
I guess its hard to pass off as a ladi back person uh?
I've done so much lately, I couldnt slow down..
Now that i've crashed so hard... I feel lost...
been unable to sleep, feeling restless and awake till late...
Oh how much i wonder can i keep on with these things...
Lately, i'm seeing that someone is going up and going down with her relationship..
frankly it has been bothering me...
but then again.. why should it? i've tried so hard to keep my feelings at bay...
but i know.. this was like what i said that time to her, "I'm just making sure i wont make the wrong decision"
HAH 1st wrong move of the year, or was it that going to school is the 1st wrong move?
why has it not crossed my mind that it wouldnt be real?
That its all just a waste of time?
Maybe because i was all too forgiving..
Mom, do you hear me?
my soul's screaming, and calling for you..
every beat of my heart aches and hurts my body..
I struggle to keep my pace in school,
And i come home to hear sis scream at sheryl...
Dad is a lil not concerned about whats happening.
How do you always seem to say, "you're fine" when people ask how are you?
I'm tired of lying.. but theres no need to say the truth..
Should i just stay silent, and blend into the darkness?
Try to leave a light on when I’m gone
Something I rely on to get home
One I can feel at night
A naked light, a fire to keep me warm
Try to leave a light on when I’m gone
Even in the daylight, shine on
And when it’s late at night you can look inside
You won’t feel so alone
You know we’ve been down that road
What seems a thousand times before
My back to a closing door and my eyes to the seasons
That roll out underneath my heels
And you don’t know how bad it feels
To leave the only one that I have ever believed in
/this is the me in I.
3:12 AM
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